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7 Smart Ways to Beat FOBO (Fear of Better Options)
“Freedom is not the absence of choice, but the courage to choose.”
— Erich Fromm
What Is FOBO (Fear of Better Options)?
You’ve probably experienced it—scrolling endlessly through Netflix without choosing a movie, revising your vacation plans five times, or second-guessing your career move because “something better might come along.”
That inner voice that whispers “What if there’s a better choice?” is the hallmark of FOBO, or Fear of Better Options. Coined by venture capitalist Patrick McGinnis (who also popularized FOMO), FOBO is the paralysis of indecision caused by an obsession with maximizing every choice.
Unlike simple overthinking, FOBO is rooted in anxiety and perfectionism—a subtle but powerful belief that the perfect outcome exists if you only look hard enough.
In a culture that glorifies optimization, options, and endless scrolling, it’s no wonder so many of us struggle to commit—to relationships, jobs, or even dinner plans.
The Psychology Behind FOBO
At its core, FOBO is an avoidance strategy. When faced with uncertainty, the brain—particularly the amygdala—activates a stress response. We begin to catastrophize: What if I make the wrong choice? What if I regret it forever?
Psychologists often connect FOBO to:
Cognitive overload: Too many choices overwhelm working memory.
Loss aversion: The fear of losing out on something better is stronger than the pleasure of what we already have.
Perfectionism: A belief that there’s one “right” option can make every other possibility feel like failure.
Attachment insecurity: People with anxious or avoidant attachment may struggle to commit for fear of abandonment or loss of freedom.
Research on decision-making supports this. Studies in Behavioral Economics show that the more options we have, the less satisfied we feel—a phenomenon known as the paradox of choice.
So, FOBO isn’t about being picky—it’s about anxiety disguised as discernment.
Reconnect With Your Inner Compass
At My LA Therapy, our clinicians specialize in helping high-achieving, analytical, and anxious individuals rebuild trust in their intuition. Through evidence-based methods like CBT and mindfulness, we’ll help you move from doubt to decisiveness—and from paralysis to peace.
How FOBO Impacts Mental Health
Constant indecision doesn’t just slow you down—it drains your emotional energy. Here’s how chronic FOBO can quietly erode your well-being:
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Decision Fatigue: Every small choice taxes the brain’s limited energy, leading to exhaustion and irritability.
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Anxiety & Rumination: FOBO fuels a loop of “what if” thinking that keeps you stuck in worry.
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Dissatisfaction & Regret: Even after choosing, you may doubt yourself, replaying “what could’ve been.”
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Emotional Avoidance: FOBO can mask deeper fears—like vulnerability, commitment, or failure.
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Loneliness & Disconnection: When you can’t commit—to friends, partners, or opportunities—you remain isolated.
Left unchecked, FOBO can morph into chronic indecision and even depression, as you begin to lose trust in your own ability to choose.
7 Smart Ways to Beat FOBO (Fear of Better Options)
1. Limit Your Options—Consciously
Paradoxically, freedom increases when we reduce our choices.
Create simple boundaries for decision-making:
Set a “top three rule.” Narrow options to three and choose one within 24 hours.
For everyday tasks—restaurants, outfits, or emails—use pre-made lists to avoid overthinking.
When you catch yourself scrolling endlessly (like on dating apps or Airbnb), pause and ask: “Is this choice meaningful or just habitual?”
By shrinking the field, you make it easier for your prefrontal cortex—the part of the brain responsible for logic and focus—to override anxiety.
2. Practice “Satisficing,” Not Maximizing
In behavioral psychology, “satisficers” choose options that are “good enough.” Maximizers, however, chase the best possible outcome—and often feel worse afterward.
Embrace the mindset of good enough for now. Remember: the goal is not perfection but progress.
When you find yourself hesitating, ask:
Does this meet my core needs?
Is there real evidence that something better exists—or is it just my fear talking?
This small cognitive shift builds confidence and reduces regret.
3. Strengthen Self-Trust Through Micro-Decisions
Every decision you make—no matter how small—is an opportunity to build internal trust.
Try this simple practice:
Each morning, make one intentional micro-decision (what to wear, what to eat) and commit fully.
Notice the relief that comes from choosing without second-guessing.
Repeat daily until decision-making feels natural.
Over time, your nervous system learns that decisions are safe, not dangerous.
For more insight, check out how self-trust enhances mental resilience and well-being.
4. Interrupt the “What-If” Spiral
FOBO thrives on hypothetical thinking: What if there’s a better job? What if this partner isn’t the one?
The key is to ground yourself in the present.
When you notice yourself spiraling, pause and try this:
Name the fear: “I’m afraid I’ll regret this.”
Validate the emotion: “It’s okay to want to make a good choice.”
Return to reality: “Right now, this option meets my needs.”
Mindfulness techniques, deep breathing, or grounding exercises help regulate the nervous system and stop the spiral before it takes over.
(Learn more about mindfulness for anxiety)
5. Examine the Roots of Your Perfectionism
FOBO often stems from a deeper fear of imperfection or failure. Many of us were raised to equate mistakes with weakness, so choosing feels like risking shame.
Therapy can help unpack these origins—whether they come from early childhood experiences, parental expectations, or trauma.
Through modalities like Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) or Inner Child Work, you can learn to reframe mistakes as experiments, not evidence of inadequacy.
If you struggle with this, our article on healing perfectionism explores how therapy can help you find freedom in imperfection.
6. Reconnect to Your Values, Not Just Outcomes
When every decision feels overwhelming, anchor yourself in values, not external metrics.
Ask yourself:
What matters most to me right now—security, creativity, love, growth?
Which option aligns best with those values?
Values-based decision-making transforms FOBO into purpose. Instead of chasing better, you choose meaningful.
Therapies like Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) are powerful tools for reconnecting with personal values and fostering aligned living.
7. Practice Emotional Regulation
Underneath indecision lies anxiety. Learning to soothe your nervous system helps you make choices with clarity instead of panic.
Try incorporating daily regulation practices:
5-minute breathwork or meditation
Gentle movement (yoga, walking, stretching)
Journaling through indecision without judgment
Setting limits on digital exposure and social comparison
Regulated emotions make space for confident choices.
If chronic anxiety or decision paralysis persists, professional therapy can help you explore underlying emotional patterns—such as fear of loss, rejection, or failure—and rewire how your brain processes uncertainty.
Therapy for Anxiety & Decision Fatigue
Learn to Calm the Mind That Won’t Stop Spinning Anxiety makes every choice feel heavier. Our anxiety therapy programs help you understand the emotional roots of overthinking, build emotional regulation tools, and restore your sense of clarity.
The Deeper Truth About FOBO: It’s Not About the Choice
At its heart, FOBO isn’t about picking the right job, partner, or opportunity. It’s about learning to live with uncertainty and trusting your ability to adapt no matter what happens.
When you make peace with imperfection, life opens up. You stop waiting for the “best” and start fully experiencing the real.
Freedom isn’t found in endless options—it’s found in commitment, presence, and trust.
Final Thoughts: Choosing Is How You Grow
Every decision you make is a statement of self-trust.
FOBO whispers that commitment is loss—but in truth, commitment is liberation. When you stop waiting for perfect, you begin to live.
The antidote to fear is not control—it’s trust. And trust begins with choosing, again and again, to believe that you can handle whatever comes next.
Stay curious, stay compassionate, and know that your journey is uniquely yours.
And in that uniqueness lies your power.
In the meantime, stay true, brave, and kind,
– Brooke
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Brooke Sprowl is an industry-leading expert and author in psychology, spirituality, and self-transformation. Her insights have featured in dozens of media outlets such as Huffington Post, Business Insider, Cosmopolitan Magazine, the Los Angeles Times, Spectrum One News, Mind Body Green, YourTango, and many more. As the founder and CEO of My LA Therapy, she leads a team of 15 dedicated therapists and wellness professionals. Brooke has been a featured speaker at prominent universities and venues such as UCLA School of Public Affairs, USC, Loyola Marymount University, the Mark Taper Auditorium, and Highways Performance Gallery, to name a few. With a Master’s degree in Clinical Social Welfare with a Mental Health Specialization from UCLA, a Bachelor’s degree in Neuroscience from USC, and certifications in peak performance and flow science from the Flow Research Collective, Brooke has helped hundreds of prominent leaders and CEO’s overcome anxiety, relationship difficulties, and trauma and reclaim a sense of purpose, vitality, and spiritual connection. With 15 years of experience in personal development and self-transformation as a therapist and coach, she has pioneered dozens of original concepts and frameworks to guide people in overcoming mental health challenges and awakening spiritually. Brooke is the host of the podcast, Waking Up with Brooke Sprowl. She is passionate about writing, neuroscience, philosophy, integrity, poetry, spirituality, creativity, effective altruism, personal and collective healing, and curating luxury, transformational retreat experiences for high-achievers seeking spiritual connection.
