Being in a Healthy Relationship in College
Imagine the following situation. Your boyfriend knows nothing about your upcoming exams. He invites you for a romantic dinner. He’s already bought flowers and booked a table at a fancy restaurant. But here is a problem – you have to finish your term paper tonight. Read this article to find out more about dos and don’ts of being in a healthy relationship in college.
Is it possible to build a healthy relationship in college? It’s possible, but then only then when both partners are ready to put some work into a relationship.
Do you feel like you have met your true soulmate? Do you want to make your relationship thrive? We have some tips for you. Here is a list of the dos and don’ts you need to be aware of as a college student.
Define your expectations
The first thing you should do is to discuss from the outset what you expect from your partner and what your partner expects from you.
That’s an important step.
If you figure out that you and your partner have a bit different expectations regarding your relationship in college, you will likely find a compromise and make your relationship work.
But if you find out that you have opposite expectations, it will be wise of you to end the relationship. There is no sense in putting effort into saving a relationship that is doomed to failure.
Support your partner
Do you want your partner to support you?
Remember that you are not the only person who experiences ups and downs. If you want to get support, make sure to provide your partner with adequate support too.
A healthy relationship in college is all about mutual support. If you find a way to help your partner to prepare for the exam, he will appreciate it a lot. If you buy your girlfriend ice cream to comfort her after the failed test, she will be grateful. If your partner wants to complain about something that upsets him down – listen to complaints and not argue.
Be there for your partner when he needs you the most, and he will do the same for you.
Make your education a priority
A healthy relationship with your partner is important. But your education is even more important.
You want to build an outstanding career and make enough money for a living, don’t you? To make it happen in the future, you should study hard now. You should do your best to acquire as much knowledge and skills as possible.
Don’t skip classes to spend more time with your partner. Your partner can wait, but your assignments and tests cannot wait.
You should discuss your priorities with your partner in advance. Your boyfriend/girlfriend should clearly understand that your study is important. Besides, you should inform him/her about all the important assignments and projects you are working on. Otherwise, that may lead to conflicts and misunderstandings.
Imagine the following situation. Your boyfriend knows nothing about your upcoming exams. He invites you for a romantic dinner. He’s already bought flowers and booked a table at a fancy restaurant. But here is a problem – you have to finish your term paper tonight.
If you reject his invitations, you will hurt his feelings. If you accept his invitation, you will fail to submit your paper by the deadline.
To prevent such situations, make sure that your partner is aware of your priorities and your study plans.
Communicate your ideas clearly
Do you know what is one of the most common reasons why couples have conflicts? Conflicts happen not because partners don’t understand each other but because they can’t express their ideas clearly enough.
Don’t expect that your partner will guess what you mean. Your partner can’t read your mind. He doesn’t have such a skill. State your ideas clearly, and then you will have nothing to argue about.
Let’s say you want your boyfriend to order a seafood pizza. It’s a bad idea to give him a hint by sending “pizza” and “shrimp” emojis. The chances your boyfriend will misinterpret your message and buy you a pepperoni pizza and pack of shrimps. Articulate your idea clearly and write a text “I want a seafood pizza”. That will guarantee that your partner will get your message right.
Set healthy boundaries
No matter how close you are to your partner, each of you needs some privacy.
You shouldn’t share your passwords with your partner even if he asks you about it.
And you shouldn’t bother your partner with questions like “why do you follow that attractive girl on Instagram?”
You need to set healthy boundaries that will allow both of you to enjoy some privacy. Seriously. You need to discuss it right away and set ground rules. It will positively influence your relationship.
If you or your partner breaks the rules, it will mean that you have problems with trust. You will have to address this issue or break up – it’s impossible to build a strong relationship without trust.
Keep your life balanced
Your partner and your school assignments are not the only things that matter. If you want to make the most out of your college life, you should find time to have fun with friends, enjoy your hobbies, and participate in extracurricular activities.
Well, it sounds like a challenging task to balance it all, but you can do it.
Spend fewer nights watching Netflix series and spend more nights playing basketball and partying with your best friends. It will bring more joy to your life and will make a positive impact on your relationship.
Don’t wait for Valentine’s Day to come to give a little romantic gift to your partner.
Be spontaneous. Be romantic. Do sweet and simple little things that will make your partner smile.
Fill his cup of coffee in the morning. Cook a dinner. Create a collage of your photo together for your first anniversary.
It will encourage your partner to make little surprises for you. And that will benefit your relationship in the long run.
Don’t give up your dreams
Do you dream of becoming a doctor, engineer, or data scientist? Don’t give up your dreams just because your partner is asking you to do it. Don’t drop out of college to be with a person who holds you back from achieving your big dream. That will be one of the biggest mistakes in your life!
Stay true to your values and be dedicated to your dream. If your partner doesn’t support you, he is not the right person for you. You should escape this toxic relationship and start a new chapter of your life.
Don’t cheat on your partner
College life is full of new experiences and endless temptations. And that’s one of the key reasons why college relationships don’t last long.
As a college student, you will attend parties and meet many new people. It’s highly likely that one day you will meet an attractive guy or girl who will make you doubt your current relationship.
If it happens, don’t cheat on your partner. Don’t opt for a one-night stand. It may look fun at first, but you will regret your misbehavior later.
Don’t break your partner’s heart!
You are a good person, aren’t you? Don’t be a cheater. Don’t start a new relationship before you end the current one.
Don’t compare your partner with others
Your partner is a unique person. He is not perfect. He has flaws, just like you do.
There are people out there who are more intelligent and more attractive than your partner. But you love your partner the way he/she is, don’t you? We always fall in love with imperfection.
So why do you compare your partner to others? It’s a bad habit you should quit!
By making comparisons, you make your partner feel worthless and miserable. And that threatens your relationship.
If you want to be in a healthy relationship in college, don’t criticize your partner. Focus on the things he is good at and the things you like the most, like the way he texts you in the morning or how he looks at you before kissing you.
Don’t listen to what people say
If you believe that you have met the right person to spend your college years (at least) with, don’t let other people affect your relationship.
Be aware that some of your college friends might be envious of your healthy relationship. And they may spread gossips and tell you lies about your partner. Don’t listen to them. Listen to your heart.
Don’t ignore the contraception rules
Probably one of the most stupid things you can do in college is to ignore the contraception rules.
No matter how much you love your partner and how much you trust him, use condoms or other barrier methods of contraception. That’s important.
Don’t allow one mistake to affect your health and your life. Be a responsible person and protect yourself and your partner against sexually transmitted infections and prevent unintended pregnancy.
Follow these simple tips, and you will build a healthy relationship in college. You will become a happier person and will make your life more fulfilled.
Guest Writer Bio
John Edwards is a writing specialist who works at the Writing Judge and Best Writers Online. He is looking for ways of self-development in the field of writing and blogging. New horizons in his beloved business always attract with their varieties of opportunities. Therefore, it is so important for him to do the writing.